A Journey in Itself

While you all are exploring exotic and foreign lands, I was left to partake in my own journey here in Tempe. That was the hair-growing journey, as partnered with Heidi's hair-growing journey. It's basically what it sounds like; we ventured out together to grow our hair as long as we possibly could.

I could estimate that I started growing my hair out in January of 2008, and it is now May of 2009. Since then, it doesn't seem like I've made much progress. My hair barely touched my shoulders, because I had kept getting it trimmed so it wouldn't turn into a mullet while I was growing out the shortest layers.

But, you see, my hair is so darn thick that even at this length (which I consider pretty long), it took at least 20 minutes to dry with my hair dryer. Frustrated by the amount of time I seemed to be wasting and slow-growing efforts, I decided that it was time for this hair-growing journey to end.

Today, I had the scissors and razor taken to my locks, and what resulted was a similar style I have sported before. Except this time, it is "Anne Hathaway" brown (as Alexa likes to call it).

Today: new shoes, new hair, new look for DC. I leave on Sunday, and I'm so stoked! But I feel so underprepared, I feel like there's not enough time left for me here in Tempe. I guess there's not much I can do now, except make sure that my fishes are properly cared for.

If there's one thing I've learned from this journey, it is that I'm never going to try and grow my hair out again.

One thing every person needs to do at least once in a lifetime: birthday suit bungee!

You know how there are certain moments that you can clearly identify as life-changing? Not life-changing in that ambiguous happy-fuzzy-rosy I-feel-so-alive way but that distinct, transformative, I-will-never-be-the-same way? Well I had one of those moments this past Sunday. In a complete reversal of everything I've ever done or dreamed of doing, I got up the nerve to go bungee jumping... naked.

It all started when two friends-of-friends who were visiting from Masaka, Kathleen and Michelle, decided to go bungee jumping into the Nile. This had definitely been on my to-do list, but as of late my rapidly depleting stores of money made the $65 price tag seem decidedly out of my reach. So I spent my Saturday watching DVDs on my laptop and eating ice cream. But then Kathleen and Michelle returned, visibly glowing and bubbling over with the remnants of the experience, and said: "Yeah we got there to check in and they asked us how we would like to pay: cash, credit, or the free option?" So what is this free option? You guessed it: you go nude, you go free. Michelle had taken them up on the offer, and judging by her complete and total state of satisfaction, I thought to myself "I can do that too." Save $65 by putting on my birthday suit? That's not really comparable to being a stripper, is it?

So the next morning my roommate Kate and I saw Kathleen and Michelle off and pondered the prospect of actually going through with this. We stumbled upon the phone number for Adrift and called, making a tentative reservation for 5 pm. Now Kate and I were accountability partners in this whole gig: it takes two people for them to open up the tower and we had made the reservation together and we were going, so neither one of us could back out now. That being said, we spent the afternoon chugging down Nile Specials (one of the local beers that's brewed just a hop, skip, and a jump away) because we figured that it's all fine-and-dandy to say you're going to bungee jump naked, but -- more for the naked part than the bungee jumping part -- it probably takes a litre of Niles to actually do it.

But at around 6:30 pm just as the sun was beginning to fall, we did it. Kate and I hiked up the tower, met the gorgeous Australian man and his Ugandan sidekick with whom we were entrusting our very lives, and after watching a few other brave souls take the plunge (clothed), we stepped right up, took a deep breath, and stripped. This is where the Big Life Change began.

The change was almost instantaneous: it was like for as long as I could remember I had this tumor of fear lodged in my stomach that would flare up and cripple me every time I thought about doing something "risky," like quitting my crappy job or standing up to my parents or calling a guy back, and the moment I stripped down in front of that sexy Australian bungee guy the tumor unlodged itself from my gut. Then, when I hopped over to the edge of the tower (they tie you in at your ankles... haha no harness or anything just your feet!), stood tall and proud in front of a crowd of squealing Ugandans and hollering muzungus, and 3...2...1... lept into the open sky with the Nile river waiting 44 metres below to break my fall, that knot of fear that had bound me all my life dissipated into nothing more than an unwelcome memory. As the air whooshed in my ears and the world enveloped my eyes, I was free. And when I reached the water and dunked into the Nile for just long enough to realize that I'd made it, I was flooded with ectasy.

The waves of joy and power and energy and liberation surged through my body as I bounced up and down above the water like a floppy fish. There was no was my smile could contain my joy nor could my body contain my energy -- I was seeping out the edges of my skin and into this beautiful world. The landscape spun around me as I tumbled through it freely, absorbing a stunning kaleidoscope of silver water, green mountains, and barely-broken sunset. Mind you I'm upside down this whole time, so the sights were so alien and disorienting and beautiful -- especially the sweeping upside-down sunset!

Once the bounces gradually became less and less high, out rowed the two guys who would raft me back to land. As they reached out to me with a paddle and cradled my naked body into the raft, little did they know that they were the first individuals on this earth to touch the new, fearless me. It was so adorable when they asked if it was "very much fun," to which I gave a resounding yes. Then one of them told me assuredly, as if to squash whatever anxiety a white woman might be experiencing when rowing naked in a raft with two strange Ugandan men, "We are all born naked easily."

We are all born naked easily. So what happens from that point forward, when trust and freedom become replaced by apprehension and shame? We spend an indefinite number of years losing sight of our innate perfection, learning to look-both-ways and be-a-good-girl/boy, walling ourselves off from our true nature and the true nature of our life on this planet: love. We are all born naked easily. And when I -- surprisingly easily -- reclaimed my nakedness, it was like something new was born inside of me. Something that, I hope, will guide me to a life of more joy and adventure and discovery and growth. The truth of the shift materialized when I stepped back on solid ground, my heart pumping hot blood and adrenalin: I knew that never again could fear limit what I might dare to attempt. That's a line from the Lady of the Bracelet definition that I'd always struggled to imagine for myself, but that very line is what spoke to me as I floated back towards the tower to retrieve my clothes.

Coming down from the tower, Kate and I gasped and giggled and stumbled around with big gestures and big remarks -- "Can you believe we just did that?!?!" "Ohmygod that was the greatest thing ever!" -- all because, in that moment, we were truly soaring on top of the world. When we reached the bar to order a pair of Nile Specials, never had the brand slogan seemed so fitting:

You've earned it.

Dear Prague, I'm really going to miss you.

Hey everyone! I just realized today that I only have one week left in the incredible city of Prauge (although I will be in Europe another two weeks traveling to Italy with my mom and to Spain to see Ian and my friend Angelina). I have horribly mixed up feelings about leaving Prague after living here for four months and it becoming my home. On the one hand, I really do miss my family and friends in the USA and I can't wait to see them again. On the other hand, I don't want to leave this beautiful city. Prague is such a complex city with so many dimensions that it is hard to grasp all of it at once. I think even after a lifetime of living here, people still haven't discovered everything. Prague reveals itself to you slowly. The longer you are here, the deeper connection you gain with the city, the people, the language and everything else you can imagine. For lack of a better way to express my feelings about the transition back to the USA, I'm resorting to the Heidi inspired list.

Things I am going to miss about Prague
Saying "Dobry den" at least ten time a day
Coming home every day and being greeted at the door with a cheerful "Ahoj!"
Smezeny Syr sandwiches
Beer for about $1 a half liter
Walking home late at night through deserted streets and feeling completely safe
Discovering new places and paths through the city
My favorite run that takes me from my house through the suburbs, to the Czech Television Station, through a park to the top of a hill that overlooks the whole city, down the hill on a staircase that passes through an old neighborhood, passing by a beer garden where people are playing volleyball, to the river, along the river, across a bridge to Petrin Hill. (and then taking the metro home because I ran too far to go back)

Things I am NOT going to miss about Prague
Smelly men in confined public transportaion

Part 1: Top 11, 12, and 13 Signs That You've Assimilated to Uganda; Part 2: Why I Can't Write a "Real" Blog Post

11. Your ATM card gets declined at Barclays. Yep, I got declined by a bank in Uganda... it doesn't get any more humiliating than that. Haha OOPS.
12. You see that ants have raided your box of cereal, and you don't even blink. Instead, you consider it a positive thing that you are probably consuming enough ants on a daily basis to count them as a significant source of protein. Ants as a health food? You betcha.
13. Your brain stem has finally, once-and-for-all detached from your cerebrum. This is made evident when you wake up to find that you have left a pot of water boiling on the gas stove ALL NIGHT and that both the gas and the water have run out. OOPS AGAIN. As my roommate Kate pointed out, we are very lucky that my lack of brain activity didn't cost us our lives via gas poisoning or fire!

So this weekend when I was up in Gulu in northern Uganda (more on that later! and more on all the other random trips I've taken and haven't even mentioned...), I was up late talking with Kate about the usual potpurri of topics, most of them revolving around that wild-and-crazy, impossible-to-understand knot of contradictions and complications we call "development." In the middle of the conversation, in which I was finally able to release many of the loopy, tangled bits and pieces of thoughts and feelings that have been bouncing around in my mind like Mexican jumping beans, I realized that the reason why I haven't been able to write a real blog post, one that delves below the surface and addresses some of those tricky, sticky questions about international affairs and development, is because I can't. Seriously.

It's one thing to have a totally unstructured and laughter-filled conversation with someone who has been living through the same experience as you and facing the same toxic mix of confusion and bewilderment, but a whooooooole other challenge to write down and express what is brewing inside you to an ambiguous audience of people who aren't here living and breathing it with you. After four months of getting really comfortable with living and working in Uganda -- and having a wonderful time doing it! -- it is still way easier for me to tell fragmented little stories or list out some of the superficial, humorous bits about life than to put into words what Uganda has really taught me. Hell, most of the time I don't even KNOW what Uganda has really taught me!

This gives me such a huge respect for authors and journalists whose job it is to travel to a foreign place, absorb all they can about a given topic there, and then barf it back up in the form of a book or blog post or article or news story. There are obviously people who are brilliant at taking something as full-out INSANE as development (or any one of the smaller sub-issues therewithin) and processing it into a form that the average American reader can understand and appreciate. Unfortunately, as you've probably noticed by now, I am not one of them. So here's hoping that with time I'll be able to sharpen up my conclusions about what works in development and what doesn't (in case you were wondering, as of yet I've got a much firmer grasp on what doesn't) and be able to share it with you via the written word. I'm nowhere close to being at that point, but when I get there, you'll be the first to know :)

Erica Goes To Washington

So I don't know if I've officially announced this, but I'm officially going to Washington D.C. this summer! So I'll actually be able to blog from a foreign location (I guess you can consider congressmen a strange species to observe). I'll be interning with Harry Mitchell's office, where I'm not exactly sure what my duties are yet, but I imagine I'll be doing lots of normal intern drudge work, most likely with constituency mail, and probably getting sad about Harry's need to satisfy certain parts of his constituency (Scottsdale). I think the drudge work will be fun though, and I'm sure there will be many great opportunities that arise.

I'm going to be traveling with the Capital Scholars program with the Political Science Department, and we'll be staying in George Washington University dorms. Todd and Scott Tippit are also doing the program, so I already know some faces. Devin says he'll be in D.C. as well for his Truman scholarship, and many others have told me they'll be spending their summer there, too. So the party's gonna be in DC! You better come visit me, it's what all the cool kids are doing (I know Brynna already is! And therefore she is a cool kid).

I feel bad, I haven't really posted in a long while. But nothing interesting has really gone on. My life has been: school, YDs, and a little bit of socializing. That's about it. I'm looking forward to shaking it up in a couple of weeks (oh my gosh it's May 1, when did that happen?!).

From your guys' posts it sounds like you're all doing very well for yourselves! I'm so happy that you all have had the opportunity to have these great experiences.

Now I should get back to the paper that I am supposed to be writing...

Selfishly awaiting the return of Brynna, Heidi, and Wylie,

Erica